Tap Away; A Technique for Releasing Birth-Related Fear

written by Emily Bergeron CD(DONA)

“What will labor be like?”

“Will I be able to handle the pain?”

“What if something goes wrong?”

“What will my body be like after?”

These are just some examples of the fears most expectant moms experience. In spite of the amount of information available to us, childbirth is still relatively unknown and mysterious to most people. Add to that the sensationalized, fear-based portrayal of birth in the media, and it’s no wonder moms are so afraid to give birth.

Fear is a very basic instinct that allows us to protect ourselves in threatening situations. In preparing to give birth, it can help us figure out where we need more information or preparation. But when we can only focus on the fears, instead of looking at solutions to those issues, it can be crippling rather than helpful. As science is now showing, fear is physiologically counterproductive to childbirth. The hormones released by our brains when we feel fearful, nervous, or uncomfortable actively inhibit the hormones needed for birth to go smoothly. As a result, labor is often longer and more painful, which then increases the amount of fear the mom is feeling.

So, how can you break this Fear-Tension-Pain cycle to allow yourself to have an easier birth? One way is by using the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).

{OK, so I’ll admit, this technique can seem a little weird at first. I was doubtful of it too, until I tried it myself and experienced its amazing results!}

EFT is a form of acupressure used to heal a wide range of physical and emotional issues. It is based on the same energy meridians used in acupuncture. Instead of needles, EFT uses tapping with the fingertips to input kinetic energy onto these meridians while thinking or speaking a positive affirmation about the specific problem. This combination of stimulation and affirmation works to clear the emotional block from the body’s bioenergy system, thus restoring balance. It is a simple yet powerful technique that anyone can learn to do.

EFT doesn’t take away the thing you are afraid of, (You still have to give birth!) but it can help you reframe the issues to reduce the intensity and allow you to focus on solutions to your fears.

To use EFT, think about your problem and notice how intensely you feel it, both emotionally and physically. Then, you simply tap firmly with your fingertips on the points shown in the diagram. 

Start with the Karate Chop point, then move from the top of your head, to the eyebrow, side of eye, under eye, under nose, chin, collarbone, under arm, and finish by tapping the insides of your wrists together. 

You can tap on either side of your body, or both at the same time. While tapping on each point, think about the problem you are having, and say or think an affirmation about it following this structure:

Even though I __________________, I completely love and accept myself.

The “blank” can be any issue you want to work on. Here are some birth-related examples:

Even though I have this fear of childbirth, I completely love and accept myself.

Even though I am afraid of the pain of labor, I completely love and accept myself.

Even though I doubt my ability to give birth, I completely love and accept myself.

Even though I am afraid my body will be damaged by childbirth, I completely love and accept myself.

Even though I doubt my ability to care for a newborn, I completely love and accept myself.

Say or think your phrase while tapping about seven times on each point. After you are done, think about your problem again, and see if the intensity of the fear is reduced at all. It may only take one round of tapping to release your fear, or it may take several. Also, tapping on one issue may bring up other issues, or clarify your fear. So, you may start out with something general, like “I am afraid to give birth”, then progress to something like, “I am afraid I will tear” or “I am worried about being exposed during birth”. If any other fears come up while you are tapping, create a new affirmation and do another round of tapping.

Do a few rounds of tapping several times a day until you feel like your problem is resolved. Right before bed is a great time to do tapping.

Be gentle with yourself, and pay attention to how your feelings change, both emotionally and physically, after tapping.

Knowledge and preparation are the key to counteracting fear of the unknown, and tapping can clarify your issues to help you know what areas you need to focus on. Find good reliable resources to help you prepare, and build a support team to help you. It is possible to enjoy your labor and birth, and preparing for birth in this way can help you move from the Fear-Tension-Pain cycle to the Relax-Accept-Enjoy cycle.