written by Emily Bergeron CD(DONA)
“What will labor be like?”
“Will I be able to handle the pain?”
“What if something goes wrong?”
“What will my body be like after?”
These are just some examples
of the fears most expectant moms experience. In spite of the amount of
information available to us, childbirth is still relatively unknown and
mysterious to most people. Add to that the sensationalized, fear-based
portrayal of birth in the media, and it’s no wonder moms are so afraid to give
birth.
Fear is a very basic
instinct that allows us to protect ourselves in threatening situations. In
preparing to give birth, it can help us figure out where we need more
information or preparation. But when we can only focus on the fears, instead of
looking at solutions to those issues, it can be crippling rather than helpful.
As science is now showing, fear is physiologically counterproductive to
childbirth. The hormones released by our brains when we feel fearful, nervous,
or uncomfortable actively inhibit the hormones needed for birth to go
smoothly. As a result, labor is often longer and more painful, which then increases the
amount of fear the mom is feeling.
So, how can you break this
Fear-Tension-Pain cycle to allow yourself to have an easier birth? One way is
by using the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).
{OK, so I’ll admit, this technique can seem a little
weird at first. I was doubtful of it too, until I tried it myself and experienced
its amazing results!}
EFT is a form of acupressure
used to heal a wide range of physical and emotional issues. It is based on the
same energy meridians used in acupuncture. Instead of needles, EFT uses tapping
with the fingertips to input kinetic energy onto these meridians while thinking
or speaking a positive affirmation about the specific problem. This combination
of stimulation and affirmation works to clear the emotional block from the
body’s bioenergy system, thus restoring balance. It is a simple yet powerful
technique that anyone can learn to do.
EFT doesn’t take away
the thing you are afraid of, (You still have to give birth!) but it can help
you reframe the issues to reduce the intensity and allow you to focus on
solutions to your fears.
To use EFT, think about your
problem and notice how intensely you feel it, both emotionally and physically.
Then, you simply tap firmly with your fingertips on the points shown in the
diagram.
Start with the Karate Chop point, then move from the top of your head, to the eyebrow, side of eye, under eye, under nose, chin, collarbone, under arm, and finish by tapping the insides of your wrists together.
You can tap on either side of your body, or both at the same time. While tapping on each point, think about the problem you are having, and say or think an affirmation about it following this structure:
Start with the Karate Chop point, then move from the top of your head, to the eyebrow, side of eye, under eye, under nose, chin, collarbone, under arm, and finish by tapping the insides of your wrists together.
You can tap on either side of your body, or both at the same time. While tapping on each point, think about the problem you are having, and say or think an affirmation about it following this structure:
Even though I __________________, I completely love and
accept myself.
The “blank” can be any issue
you want to work on. Here are some birth-related examples:
Even though I have this fear
of childbirth, I completely love and accept myself.
Even though I am afraid of
the pain of labor, I completely love and accept myself.
Even though I doubt my
ability to give birth, I completely love and accept myself.
Even though I am afraid my
body will be damaged by childbirth, I completely love and accept myself.
Even though I doubt my
ability to care for a newborn, I completely love and accept myself.
Say or think your phrase
while tapping about seven times on each point. After you are done, think about
your problem again, and see if the intensity of the fear is reduced at all. It
may only take one round of tapping to release your fear, or it may take
several. Also, tapping on one issue may bring up other issues, or clarify your
fear. So, you may start out with something general, like “I am afraid to give
birth”, then progress to something like, “I am afraid I will tear” or “I am
worried about being exposed during birth”. If any other fears come up while you
are tapping, create a new affirmation and do another round of tapping.
Do a few rounds of tapping
several times a day until you feel like your problem is resolved. Right before
bed is a great time to do tapping.
Be gentle with yourself, and
pay attention to how your feelings change, both emotionally and physically,
after tapping.
Knowledge and preparation are the key to counteracting fear of the unknown, and tapping can clarify your issues to help you know what areas you need to focus on. Find good reliable resources to help you prepare, and build a support team to help you. It is possible to enjoy your labor and birth, and preparing for birth in this way can help you move from the Fear-Tension-Pain cycle to the Relax-Accept-Enjoy cycle.
